Choke on Your Lies by Anthony Neil Smith is available on Kindle for just 99 cents.
Description:
Octavia VanderPlatts is wealthy, powerful, and "comfortable with her weight"--or to hear her say it, a "rich fat b****." Her IQ is at the genius level, and she uses it to manipulate and frighten anyone who tries to get in her way. She controls an empire built on discrimination lawsuits won against some of the nation's top companies. On top of that, Octavia doesn't care one wink what people think of her.
So when she offers her old friend poetry professor Mick Thooft some help in his impending divorce, he smells an ulterior motive. Maybe because Frances didn't invite Octavia to the wedding for fear of her clearing the buffet. Not only does Octavia want to help, but she's got evidence--plenty of scandalous photos. That's not Mick's style, so he turns her down flat...until he discovers that Fran's trying to take their home based on a near-perfect forgery of his signature. After that he and Octavia charge forward, but soon find they're in deeper than they realized--robot pens, swinger clubs, and a blackmail scheme that holds an entire college faculty hostage.
Just when Mick and Octavia are on the cusp of victory, it all goes terribly wrong. Mick is framed for murder and someone targets Octavia's immense wealth and secret backyard greenhouse full of exotic marijuana. With no one on their side except Octavia's butler Jennings, her new personal chef Harriet, and their "Amazon Warrior" lawyer Pamela, Octavia and Mick must find a way to turn the tables before they end up broke, humiliated, and in prison.
So when she offers her old friend poetry professor Mick Thooft some help in his impending divorce, he smells an ulterior motive. Maybe because Frances didn't invite Octavia to the wedding for fear of her clearing the buffet. Not only does Octavia want to help, but she's got evidence--plenty of scandalous photos. That's not Mick's style, so he turns her down flat...until he discovers that Fran's trying to take their home based on a near-perfect forgery of his signature. After that he and Octavia charge forward, but soon find they're in deeper than they realized--robot pens, swinger clubs, and a blackmail scheme that holds an entire college faculty hostage.
Just when Mick and Octavia are on the cusp of victory, it all goes terribly wrong. Mick is framed for murder and someone targets Octavia's immense wealth and secret backyard greenhouse full of exotic marijuana. With no one on their side except Octavia's butler Jennings, her new personal chef Harriet, and their "Amazon Warrior" lawyer Pamela, Octavia and Mick must find a way to turn the tables before they end up broke, humiliated, and in prison.
From the Reviewers:
"If you've been looking for an author to save you from business as usual crime writing, then Anthony Neil Smith is the writer you've been searching for. In CHOKE ON YOUR LIES, he takes the Nero Wolfe model of storytelling and has jazzed it smack-in-the-face style. Not only will your jaw drop, but your tongue will jump out of your mouth and kick you in the balls with claymation tongue feet...I just had my head exploded by Smith's remarkable novel."
--Victor Gischler, author of GUN MONKEYS
"If you've been looking for an author to save you from business as usual crime writing, then Anthony Neil Smith is the writer you've been searching for. In CHOKE ON YOUR LIES, he takes the Nero Wolfe model of storytelling and has jazzed it smack-in-the-face style. Not only will your jaw drop, but your tongue will jump out of your mouth and kick you in the balls with claymation tongue feet...I just had my head exploded by Smith's remarkable novel."
--Victor Gischler, author of GUN MONKEYS
"Choke on Your Lies is not a breakneck, rattle it in your face read, it's more considered than that. ANS delivers a finely-plotted and deftly structured story of a cuckolded husband reluctantly evening the score with an uber be-atch of a wife. The prose sings and the story rings true as the fully-rounded characters slide in and out like an insane chorus of the ill intentioned. ANS is shaping up to be one of the sharpest exponents of American noir. Not to be missed."
--Tony Black, author of PAYING FOR IT and GUTTED.
About the Author:
Born and raised on the Mississippi Gulf Coast, Anthony Neil Smith now lives on the frozen prairies of rural Minnesota, where he teaches at Southwest Minnesota State University. He's the author of PSYCHOSOMATIC and THE DRUMMER. He's also the editor of the online noir fiction zine PLOTS WITH GUNS.
Follow Anthony Neil Smith on Twitter: @DocNoir
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